He will protect those who love Him and call on His name...

Today was kinda rough... it is Sunday and I had to work about 11 hours. I am not used to not being able to spend my Sunday with other believers in worship. I woke up this morning not sure if I was going to even be able to go to service let alone find an actual Church. I did however email a few people and found out that there was a contemporary service at 2000. Which is perfect cause I get off at 5-6ish on Sundays. So I went to service and totally felt the Lord there. I sat by myself and felt like it was just Me and God throughout most of the service. I had been around people ALL day long and just wanted to fall into my Father's arms alone. I didn't talk to anyone and didn't really want to. While I was there sitting in His house I don't know why but I just kinda broke down. I felt like all of the anxiousness and sadness that I have pushed aside the last few days being away from my friends and my family just all hit at once. I sat throughout the entire service with tears on the edge of my eyelids just waiting to fall. The Pastor spoke about the obedience of Joseph and Mary and emphasized that the Lord chose them because he knew that they would be obedient. He asked us if we were the kind of people that the Lord knows will be obedient to him. It was like he was saying exactly what I needed to hear. Right then I knew why I am here. I am being prepared to be that person that the Lord can call on and expect faithfulness and obedience.

The Lord totally spoke to me tonight...I feel like I am revamped and know that I need to use my time here to totally focus on Him and let him mold me. I don't know what for but I need to let him turn me into that person that he knows will be obedient. I want to be used!! After service I sat listening to the worship band wrap up and silently talked to the Lord. The tears finally fell and I felt an overwhelming joy/sadness/helplessness and got up and silently walked out planning to use my walk home to release all of these emotions and just cry out to the Lord in the dark.

I was not even 20 feet from the front door when another guy who was walking home slowed down and struck up conversation. I silently pulled myself together grateful for the mask of the darkness and started talking to him. His name was Mike and he is an older man who was in the Army but is now a contractor. On our walk home I found out that he does something with the Church everynight, is from San Antonio, and found the Lord during his stay in Mosul a year ago. He told me about all of the activities that are available at the two churches that are in walking distance from my hooch (my trailer for those of you who don't know the terminology). He totally reassured me that God's people are definitely here on this Camp. We talked for about an hour about his family and how we came to know the Lord and how both of us felt the Lord brought us here but that we are just trying to wait patiently to see the big picture. It was exactly what I needed. I needed to have contact with someone who is a believer also. At work there is no one to talk to about the Lord and it makes it difficult.

Mike also told me about how over Thanksgiving weekend there was a mortar attack where 4 mortars were shot here in my neighboring area and how one of the mortars was headed to the DFAC right across from my store that I eat lunch at but that it fell just short and hit a motor pool instead, one mortar was hit by some of our guns and destroyed in air, one mortar landed in an open area where a bunch of soldiers were...it hit the ground and was a dud, one hit someones hooch but the soldier who lived there had been chatting with his wife when his internet went out... he got frustrated and left his hooch moments before it got hit... turns out that his internet was the only internet to go out in that living area, one of the Cpts that goes to our church was actually in the hooch next to him and had been so tired that day that he totally passed out and woke up after all of the schrapnel hit his living quarters...he was completely untouched and said that he knows that the reason that he was untouched was because he found the Lord 4 months ago

I know that Mike telling me this was God's way of reassuring me that Psalm 91 is God's promise to me... I have been really nervous since my sister told me that they had an incoming this week at her base...I know that I have no control over that and it drives me crazy... but I know that God's promise is Psalm 91 holds true...he will protect both Lara and Me.

"Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him salvation"

Psalm 91:14-16